Home
by The Little Monster 1024
Summary: "I'm just too far from where you are, I wanna come home."
1. Chapter 1

**Home**

**Chapter One**

**AN: This is going to be a series of oneshots, Castle going away on book tours. This first chapter takes place in season four, it takes place in the middle of the season so just we'll pretend it happened between two of the episodes. **

* * *

"_Another summer day has come and gone away in Paris in Rome,_

_But I wanna go home."_

* * *

"Didn't you already go on a book tour?" She asked him as she read over some paperwork. They'd just finished their latest case. It was easy, quick. A robbery gone wrong.

He nodded. "Yeah, in America. European tour now."

She raised her eyebrow a little, giving him a little smile. "Europe? Wow."

"The people love Nikki." He said. "Just as much as you do." A smirk on his face.

"What makes you think that I love your books?" She could play coy as much as she wanted, Castle knew. She stood and walked over to the murder board, taking down the few things that they'd stuck up there. Castle stood to help, grabbing the eraser and wiping away the red writing.

"I'll be gone for three weeks." He told her, looking at her.

She nodded. "We'll try to manage."

The smile she was giving him was soft, teasing. He returned a smile but he's pretty sure it was just a stupid grin, he was reduced to some crushing teenager when she smiled at him like that.

They finished cleaning the board and picking up from the remnants of their hard work, packing away case files and putting evidence into boxes and stuffing it on a shelf. Castle told the boys goodbye and they each left, Ryan to see Jenny and Esposito to do whatever he had planned after work, leaving Castle and Beckett as the only two left in the bullpen.

"Well, I guess I should go, get the rest of my things packed."

She nodded, looking up at him as he stood from his chair. "Okay. Have a safe trip."

"Thanks."

She nodded again, giving him a small, silent smile that held so much more than she'd allow her words to offer. He smiled back and with a longing, loving look, he left.

* * *

Two weeks went by. They went by in a flash of faces, of books, and sharpie markers; in hotel rooms and room service, in different countries, an array of accents and languages. He was surrounded by thousands of people everyday, but he felt so alone.

He had his team, he had Paula and a few others, but he longed for someone more familiar, someone to talk to. Alexis couldn't come with him because of school and her internships and his mother had been busy with her acting studio.

But if he was honest with himself, he longed for the company of her. Of Beckett.

He saw her everywhere, in everything. When he was in Paris, he saw her in the beauty of the city, in the love that hung in the air. He saw her in every couple that walked by, wishing that he could be holding her hand in the way that the man across the street held the hand of his beautiful companion. In Rome, it was the architecture. It stood so strong, but breathtakingly beautiful. Years and years since it'd been built, but it remained intact, standing tall. Just like her.

Many nights, he'd lay in bed, thinking of her. Her smile. Her eyes, the way she rolled them at him. That cute little way she looked over the murder board.

Sometimes he felt guilty for how much he thought of her, for how much he missed her. He didn't even have the right to miss her so much. She wasn't his girlfriend, they weren't together.

_Yet._ He told himself, he hoped so much that it was true. It'd been months since that day on the swings, since she told him about her walls, even longer since she told him that she didn't remember.

He loved her. Was completely, totally, hopelessly in love with her. When he almost lost her, it was the worst moment of his life. Any doubt he'd had in his mind completely flew away as he held her, as blood seeped from her body just as the life started to drain out, as tears rolled from her eyes he pleaded with her to stay with him, to just hold and stay with him, he loved her.

But she didn't remember.

Maybe that was for the best. Maybe now, when those walls came down, he could tell her again. Tell her over a special dinner or while they walked through Central Park holding hands. He could tell her when she wasn't bleeding out on the grass.

He'd make it special.

Yeah.

She deserved special.

He did have a right to miss her he decided one night after a book signing. She was his partner, his best friend and one day, hopefully they'd be so much more. He was allowed to miss her. He was allowed to dream of the moment he'd see her again, the moment he'd walk into the precinct again and the boys would greet him and she'd smile, welcome him back, maybe tease him about the amount of chests he'd signed in Europe.

He wrote to her. Little notes, not even full letters.

_How are you?_

_Catch any killers?_

_Miss me?_

Of course, he didn't send any of them. Sometimes he'd grab his phone, type out a message, erasing and starting over several times until it was just perfect only to delete it before he worked up the courage to send it to her.

Sometimes it made him angry, how nervous he was to just send her a freaking text message. He was frustrated enough one night that he hit the send button. 'Hey, Beckett. Have you been able to solve anything without me?'

He laid there for a few minutes without a reply and he started thinking that maybe it was really late in New York, he'd never bothered to look up the time difference.

His phone buzzed.

'Not at all. When you left, the whole city shut down.'

He read it in her voice, smiling at the sarcasm laced words. He quickly typed out a reply, his thumbs moving a lightening speed.

'I was afraid that would happen.' He sent back, he'd play along.

'Alright, Writer Boy, tone it down. How's the tour?'

He laughed, really laughed for the first time since he left. 'Good. My hand hurts from signing so many books.'

Her replies were coming as fast as his now.

'And chests.'

'Nope, no chests.'

That must have surprised her because it took a couple minutes for her to reply.

'Where are you tonight?'

'Rome.'

'What's it like?' She asked.

'You've never been?'

'Nope. Just Russia and France.'

'I'll bring you along the next time I come to Rome.' He smiled as typed out the message, hoped the next time he went on tour she could come too.

'It's a date.'

His heart skipped a beat as he read that message. His phone buzzed with another one.

'Missing NY yet?'

'Yeah, definitely craving a good burger.'

'Hurry up and get back then, I'll take you to Remy's. My treat.'

Soon after that, she told him she had to go and that she'd see him when he got back. He tossed his phone aside.

God, he wanted to go home.

* * *

**Shoutout to Ellie (rainbowdango) for the line 'Alright, Writer Boy, tone it down. How's the tour?' because I literally spent twenty minutes staring at my laptop trying to come up with a response to Castle's text.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Home**

**Chapter Two**

**AN: Season Five. After 5x05, the 3XK case.**

* * *

"_And I know just why you could not come along with me_

_this was not your dream_

_But you've always believed in me."_

* * *

"Are you sure that you can't come?" He asked, almost pouting as she walked with him through the airport. "I could get you another ticket like that." He snapped his fingers to further prove his point.

"I told you, Castle, three weeks is too long to be away from work." She told him, her fingers moving to lace with his. She really was sorry that she couldn't go. She'd love to go exploring Europe with Castle, but like she said, three weeks was just too much. Maybe next year she'd told him. That led him to ask her if she was planning on being with him in a year.

Of course she did.

She'd said always, hadn't she?

Castle gave her a little smile. He knew she wanted to come with him. She wasn't a clingy girlfriend, really, but what couple wanted to be separated for three weeks? Especially after the Jerry Tyson fiasco. After they'd been so close to losing each other.

But Paula had already booked the trip, he had to go.

It'd be fine. She'd be fine, he'd be fine.

They'd both be fine. Or at least that's what he'd kept mentally telling himself the previous night while they were laying in bed, Kate asleep with her head on his shoulder and his arm around her naked back.

He was worried about leaving her. He didn't care how many times she told him that he was dead, Castle wouldn't believe that Tyson was gone until his cold body was lying on Lanie's autopsy table.

Of course, he knew that it was dumb to worry. She could definitely protect herself. She could defend herself better than he could, but he still worried. Tyson was evil, sneaky, and he wanted to get to Castle. What better way than to...

He stopped in his tracks, she looked at him. Confused. "Maybe I should stay."

"Castle..."

"Kate."

"_Castle._" She gently squeezed his arm. "You're going."

He looked at her and she looked back at him. Talking with her eyes. They'd always been so good at that.

"He's dead." She said softly. "Gone. You shot him."

His hesitated but then nodded, he knew he couldn't change her mind on that. And maybe he was being a little ridiculous. She could protect herself. Tyson wasn't dead, but he was gone. Off somewhere planning his next scheme, which oddly enough brought him a little comfort. He'd be out of their hair for awhile and when he did come back, they'd be ready. It'd be okay. They'd be okay.

She stood on her toes, so much shorter than him in her boots, and kissed him gently, sweetly. One of his arms wrapped around her waist, holding her close to him before he would have to go three weeks without the familiar warmth of her body pressed to his.

She pulled back after a moment, giving him a beautiful smile. "You're going to miss your flight."

He sighed a little, but still smiled, how could he not? He leaned down and pecked her lips one more time before letting her go. "I should go."

"Yeah."

"I'll call you when I land."

She nodded, still smiling as he turned to leave.

"Castle?"

He turned back to look at her.

"Don't forget, okay?"

He smiled at her. "I won't." He turned again, this time handing his ticket over and then disappearing from Kate's sight, through the little hallway to the plane.

She walked over to the window, watching the plane that he'd surely boarded by then. She waited, watching as the plane's wheels started spinning and then the plane moved forward, faster and faster until the plane was gone.

* * *

He didn't think that it was possible, but his intense longing to see her only intensified. Now that they were together, he didn't feel any guilt about missing her. He didn't feel bad when he saw something beautiful and immediately wanted to show her; he didn't feel bad for wanting to kiss her senseless in the middle of Paris.

As he walked through the city, he mentally kept notes of things he wanted to show her next year when she came with him. A little cafe on a street corner, barely bigger than his living room. It was small, but cozy and the coffee was delicious. He'd definitely have to take her.

He wanted to take her hands and lead her through the streets of Rome, rattle off facts about the building that he'd googled earlier that day just to impress her. He wanted to bring her to the nice hotels that he was staying at, watch her excited face when she caught sight of the huge jacuzzi tub that was even bigger than his. He really couldn't wait to slip into it with her.

Everywhere he went, he tried to stop in a shop somewhere, find a gift for everyone. Little gifts, knick-knacks and things. He'd found a little shop in Paris that had looked promising. He stepped inside, the little bell above the door jingling throughout the empty shelf.

A little old woman looked at him from behind the desk. He smiled and waved a little. "Hi."

"Hello!" She said, speaking fluent English with a heavy French accent. "Can I help you with anything?" Shakily standing from her chair.

Castle shook his head. "I'm just looking, but thank you, though."

She nodded, smiling and sitting back down.

He walked down the aisles, looking on the shelves, looking away from the expected little glass Eiffel Towers. His eyes scanned through the little trinkets and glass figurines that were scattered about, no order to the way the shelves were lined.

As he neared the end of an aisle, something caught his eye. Two little glass elephants with their trunks intertwined. The elephants were dark red, their eyes were closed and had painted on smiles. Castle smiled, reaching out and gently picking up the elephants. Kate loved elephants, they could sit on her desk with the others.

"Beautiful animals." Came the voice of the old woman who'd walked over to him.

Castle nodded. "My girlfriend loves them."

"There's a lot of symbolism around elephants." She said as she picked up a different little figurine, turning it over in her hands.

"Really?" Castle asked.

The woman nodded. "Oh, yes. A lot of cultures have different ones too." Castle smiling, listening. The woman went one. "As a Chinese symbol, the elephant represents happiness and longevity. The religion of Hinduism associates the elephant with the god, Ganesha, who is the god of good luck. In Christian symbolism, it represents temperance and chastity."

Castle listened, intrigued by the meanings of his girlfriend's favorite animal.

"A more universal idea is that the elephant symbolizes strength, honor, stability, and patience." She told him.

"That sounds like Kate." He said with a smile. It really did. Kate's honor and her strength, it couldn't be matched. Her stability and her patience to deal with him, to do that job that she does so well, it's there, it's evident.

"Sounds like a heck of a woman."

"Oh, she is."

The woman asked him about Kate, about their relationship. Castle told her willingly, happy to be able to talk to someone about something other than book signings and flight delays. He was so sick of work, so so sick of it. He liked talking about_ them_, about Kate. He could do it for hours. Hell, he'd written five best sellers about it.

He told the woman about how they'd met, about how much he annoyed her and how much he pushed her. He told her everything, save for a few details about Johanna's case. He told her their story. She was more than happy to listen as she rang up the elephants for him, wrapped them up in some bubble wrap.

When he finished, she told him about her husband, her John who'd died a few years prior of lung cancer. She told him how John had fought in Vietnam and she worried every day he was gone, how every knock on the door sent a shiver down her spine, afraid that it was a man in uniform to deliver the news. She told him that watching the strongest man she knew slowly fade away everyday was the worse thing that she'd experienced. She told Castle that he and his Kate had to cherish every moment that they had.

Castle had agreed. He paid for his gift and thanked the woman for a wonderful morning. He smiled as he made his way out of the shop, he reached into his pocket and dialed Kate's number, needing to hear her voice, to tell her that he missed her.

She picked up on the fourth ring. "Beckett." She mumbled

"Kate, hey!" He couldn't keep the cheerful tone from his voice.

He heard her groan. "Castle, it's four in the morning."

"Oh, it is?"

"Yes." She hissed. "You really need to learn the time changes."

"I can let you go..."

He heard her stifle a yawn. "No, it's fine. I'm up now."

He didn't even try to hide his smile. "So, Beckett, do you miss me yet?"

"You mean do I miss your snoring and stealing the covers? Because, no, I don't." She was wide awake now, teasing him and loving it.

"You wound me, Beckett. And I don't snore!"

"Oh, yes, you do. It's not too loud, but you're definitely snoring, old man."

"Old man!?" He practically yelled, drawing a bunch of attention his way.

She laughed at him, laughing really hard.

"Old man." He scoffed. "I don't think an old man could make you scr-"

"Castle, please tell me you didn't just say that in public."

"That's what you get for calling me old."

The line was quiet for a second before he heard her voice again, all low and seductive. "I'm sorry. I'll make it up to you when you get back."

His breath caught.

He needed to go home.

* * *

**What do you think? **

**Holy shit two chapters in one week**


	3. Chapter 3

**Home **

**Chapter Three**

**AN: Season 6; spoilers up through 6x13...and this is where it gets AU-ish.**

* * *

"_I just wanna go home_

_Oh, I miss you, you know."_

* * *

Castle looked out the window from his seat in first class, he watched the clouds, his mind lost in his thoughts. He was really disappointed that she didn't come with him. He'd really been looking forward to showing her around Europe. He'd really, really been looking forward to spending three weeks with her, away from New York. Aside from the book signings, they'd have some time alone, just to themselves.

But a few days before he was about to leave, she got sick. She couldn't keep anything down, her fever went up. She was cold one minute and then burning up the second. He'd wanted to cancel and stay with her, but she said she was starting to feel a little better and she said she might stay at the loft a couple nights to let Martha keep any eye on her if she got sick.

Of course, that was after he bugged her so much that she agreed. She had said that she was a grown woman and could take care of herself, but Castle refused to leave if she didn't promise to at least go to the loft if she got sick again.

She rode in the cab with him to the airport, but she didn't go inside. She kissed his cheek and told him that she'd see him in a few weeks and that she loved him. He told her that he loved her too and then kissed the top of her head, promising to call her later that night.

Castle sighed a little, looking away from the window. He loved book tours, he really did. He loved meeting the fans. But three weeks away from his fiancee? Not something he wanted.

* * *

She'd been feeling better when he left, she really had been, but a week and a half went by, and it was back. And it was back with a vengeance. She'd caved and went to the doctor, who'd told her it was just the flu and that bed rest and fluids should help drive it from her system.

After she'd had to rush out of an interrogation to avoid getting sick all over their suspect, Gates had sent her home until she was better.

It'd been two days since that happened and Kate still wasn't any better. She was miserable. Accompanying her upset stomach was a stuffy, runny nose and a cough that made her throat ache badly. It hurt to eat, to talk. Her voice was unrecognizable, it was so hoarse and scratchy.

She pulled her blanket tighter around herself as more chills went through her body, only to kick it off when she started sweating. She sighed and rolled over onto her back, wincing as her head thumped at the movement.

She hated being sick, absolutely hated it. She felt useless laying in bed all day; she'd rather be working or doing something, anything other than staring at her ceiling.

The last time she had gotten sick was over a year ago. The flu, the same thing that she had now. Castle'd insisted on taking care of her. He brought her soup and made sure she was always comfortable. At the time, she thought he was being ridiculous, his hovering was a little annoying. He wouldn't let her do anything herself. He even climbed into the shower with her to help her, even though she'd protested, it was a little sweet, and was definitely better than making the effort of doing it herself.

As much as she'd complained then, as much as she'd claimed to hate it, she would've given anything for him to be there taking care of her then.

She sighed a little and looked over at the clock. 1 PM. She'd woken up at 10 and then tried to eat some soda crackers. Afraid she'd get sick, she just nibbled on a few and then crawled back into bed. She hadn't gotten sick, instead she fell back to sleep for a few hours.

She lifted her arm and ran a hand through her hair, grimacing at the gross feel of it. She needed a shower.

It took her a couple minutes but she eventually gathered up the strength to get out of bed. She walked slowly to her bathroom, wincing with every movement, sniffling as her nose ran. When she saw herself in the mirror, she groaned a little. She was a mess.

She walked over to the shower and turned it on, finding the perfect temperature. She pulled a towel from the closet and sat it aside. As she pulled her clothes off, her body ached and she was surprised by just how cold everything felt.

* * *

Castle dialed her number again, only to be sent to voice mail right away. Her phone was either off or had died. Probably the latter; she never shut her phone off, but she did have a horrible habit of waiting until the very last minute to charge it.

He had called Ryan a couple minutes before when he couldn't get a hold of her, only to find out that Kate's been really sick and hadn't been to work in a few days. He'd been so busy the last few days that they'd only texted, not actually talked on the phone.

He kept redialing the number, worried about her.

* * *

The shower had felt amazing. The hot water soothed her aching bones and helped clear out her stuffy nose for a little bit. Her headache was gone and all that was left was extreme exhaustion. She finished rubbing her hair through the towel and pulled her underwear on to walk through her bedroom. Opening up her drawer, she found one of Castle's sweatshirts that she wore to bed sometimes. She smiled a little as she slipped it over her head, wrapped up in its softness.

She yawned and made her way over to her bed. As she climbed under her blanket, she grabbed her phone from the nightstand, she'd shut it off the other night, not wanting to be disturbed. Right as her phone buzzed to life, it started ringing with a call from Castle.

She smiled a little as she answered. "Hey, Castle." She said, her voice still rough.

"Oh, geez, you sound terrible."

"Thanks."

"Ryan said you haven't been to work." He said. "I thought you were better."

"Me too. But the last few days have been awful; the doctor said it was the flu." She laid down, holding her phone with her shoulder as she pulled the blanket up around her.

"Do you need me to come home?"

"No, no, Castle, I can take care of myself. I'm a big girl."

"Why don't you go to the loft? My mother can-"

"Really," She interrupted. "I'm fine."

She heard him sigh a little, worried about her. "Okay, just, if you need anything, she'd help you out."

"I know." Kate said, a little softer. She knew Martha would do anything for her. She knew that she could go to the loft if she wanted to. But as much as she loved Martha, the loft didn't feel right without Castle there. "I miss you." She said, even softer.

"I miss you too."

Kate smiled and then a little yawn escaped.

"I'll let you go so you can get your rest." He told her.

She nodded, even though he couldn't see her. "Mmkay."

"I love you."  
"Love you too."

She hung up her phone and sat it aside, bringing her legs up to her chest to curl up in a little ball, all tucked in on herself for warmth. She couldn't wait for him to get back so she could go to his loft and cuddle up with him. They'd lay in bed, her in his arms. He needed to come back.

She wanted to go home.

* * *

**A few of you lovely reviewers suggested Kate's POV. What do you guys think? **

**This whole three updates a week NEVER happens, getting the flu came with inspiration as well as vomiting. Lucky me.**

******  
SPOILER  
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**for those of you who already watched the episode, what did you think of Beckett's dress? I'm curious, everyone on Tumblr seems to have strong feelings toward one side of the argument or the other.**


	4. Chapter 4

**Home**

**Chapter Four**

**AN: A year after the last chapter. **

* * *

"_I'm surrounded by a million people _

_I still feel all alone_

_And I wanna go home"_

* * *

A part of him was starting to think that the universe just didn't want them to go on a book tour together. Another year rolled around; another book, another tour, another reason she couldn't come with him. This time, she was in the middle of a huge court case that she couldn't get away from. As much as she'd wanted to, as much as Gates would've loved to let her take the vacation she deserved, it just wasn't something that she could miss.

So, they'd have to settle for the occasional phone call; maybe some texts throughout the day or if they were really lucky, they could talk on Skype before bed. But that usually didn't happen; with the time difference and their hectic schedules, it was practically impossible.

As he went through the cities from bookstore to bookstore, he snapped pictures and took little videos to show her later. He still kept a mental catalog of places he wanted to take her. At this point, they'd have to extend the trip to a month to just fit it all in.

He stopped by little shops, bought souvenirs for everyone. He might've bought a little too much this time, but hey, who'd complain. Besides Kate. Who wouldn't really complain but tell him it was unnecessary and then get excited because he was a pretty good gift-giver. Especially for her. After seven years of being partners, three years of being together, a year of marriage; he knew her well.

The tour went by rather quickly. He signed many, many books, took pictures with fans, and read some from the latest Nikki novel. The new novel was easily becoming the fan favorite of the series. It was action packed and full of Nikki and Rook scenes. The story was full of suspense, the readers were left wondering if the characters would make it.

He'd began writing the latest Heat novel after a stressful, emotionally grueling, just all out traumatizing case where, for the first time in a while, he'd almost lost her. It'd been a serial killer. When the case started, he'd joked. _They hadn't had one of those in a while._ They got close to him. So, so close that he decided that he needed to take action. She had been walking out to her car, leaving the precinct to meet him at home when he grabbed her. Chloroformed her and dragged her to some abandoned building. He beat her within an inch of her life before they'd found her over twelve hours later. When the guy heard them approaching, he grabbed Kate, held his gun to her temple, daring them to make a move. Castle didn't know how it happened, it was all a blur, but the guy hit the ground, his chest pouring blood. She hit the ground too, too weak and hurt to stand. He carried her out of there, her arms around his neck. He laid her in an ambulance that sped them off to the hospital. He'd come so close to losing her. He had to do something, so, he wrote. A best-seller, in fact. What became the fans' favorite book, became his least favorite.

Kate liked it, though. She said it showed how united of a team they were, showed how Rook would do anything for Nikki. She said that the story was real, showed the love that they had for each other. If Kate liked it, he could deal with it. If it makes dealing with that day easier for her, he'd deal with it.

He just knows that he won't be reading it any time soon.

* * *

He was going home early. Only a couple hours. But still, early. As he was waiting for his flight, he called her.

She picked up on the third ring, her voice heavy with weariness. "Beckett."

"Hey, it's me." He said softly.

"Oh, hey."

"Were you asleep?" He asked.

"No, just ate dinner. I'm tired, though. Think I'll go to bed soon."

He nodded even though she couldn't see him. "You'll meet me at the airport tomorrow?" He asked, smiling to himself. He wasn't telling her he was coming home early, he'd decided to surprise her.

"Mhm."

Castle chuckled a little. "You sound exhausted. I'll go so you can get some sleep. I love you."

"Love you too."

She hung up just as it was time for him to board his flight. He smiled excitedly as he walked through the little hallway and onto the plane. He couldn't wait to see her.

* * *

He pushed the door open quietly, careful not to wake her. She needed her rest, he was always on her about that. She worked too hard, pushed herself so much; she needed rest. He kicked his shoes off and hung his coat up, shutting the closet door softly. He picked up his luggage so the wheels weren't too loud on the hard floor.

He slowly walked through the office, sitting his luggage aside, leaving it to put away tomorrow. He peeked into their bedroom. The moonlight danced across her body, the loose t-shirt of his that she wore to bed, the incredibly short shorts that he loved so very much; across her face, her face peaceful, mouth in an tiny smile. He crept across the room, slipping out of his pants and shirt, wearing only his boxers and t-shirt, he climbed into bed. He reached down and grabbed the covers that she'd surely kicked off sometime in the night, he pulled them up over both of them, his arm gently wrapping around Kate's waist, spooning her body to his.

She stirred, her eyes fluttering open. Her body tensed and then relaxed back against his. "Castle." She murmured.

"Hey." He whispered, pressing a soft kiss to her shoulder.

She smiled and then turned in his arms so that she was facing him. "I thought you wouldn't be back until noon tomorrow."

He shrugged a little, smiling as he did. "Got an earlier flight."

She reached up and gently cradled his cheek, her thumb running over the little bit of stubble growing. His smile grew wider and she couldn't help but kiss him. His hold on her waist tightened as she kissed him softly.

"I missed you too." He said after she pulled back.

Her smile reached her eyes, made them shine beautifully. Her fingers played with the hair at his temple, fiddling with the few gray strands that were starting to appear, the ones that he hated but she loved. "I got you something." She whispered, biting her lip.

"You did?"

She nodded, pushing back a little to sit up and reach over to her nightstand. She pulled the drawer open and reached inside, grabbing a little white box with a white bow on top. She held it for a second as he sat up and then slowly handed it to him.

He smiled at her, that giddy smile that she loved.

She watched him intently, her smile soft and full of love, like their first Valentines Day when she gave him his drawer.

He pulled the end of the ribbon, the bow falling away from the box. He glanced up at her and then slowly took the lid of the box off, moving the sheer paper aside to reveal a tiny pair of mint green shoes. He gently lifted them from the box, his breath caught in his throat.

"They won't fit right now." She whispered. "But in a couple months..."

He looked up at her, full of disbelief. "You're pregnant?"

She nodded, a bright smile blooming on her face. He let out a surprised gasp, laughing joyously and hugging her tightly. She wrapped her arms around him, laying her head on his shoulder to whisper in his ear.

"Welcome home, Daddy."

* * *

**What did you guys think?**

**This chapter was a bit different. AU because we haven't seen this season yet. This chapter goes all over the place, a little. It talks about the new book and the scary part of her job that they face and then a bright part of their future. I thought it went well together. The scary, bad parts and then the joy of the pregnancy. _"Even on the worst days, there's a possibility for joy."_ I included a part about him getting home that actually being away, but I figured you guys wouldn't mind too much. :) **

**Reviews are wonderful. Thank you guys so much.**


	5. Chapter 5

**Home **

**Chapter Five**

**AN: Sorry for the long wait. Walking pnemonia isn't fun. **

**A year later.**

* * *

"_Another airplane_

_another sunny place, I'm lucky I know,_

_But I wanna go home"_

* * *

"Maisie, say hi to Daddy!" Kate said, smiling as she gently held the phone to her six month old's ear. The little girl's hand went up to cover her Mommy's over the phone. She made a little noise, looking up at Kate.

Kate smiled brightly, her other hand reaching out and running through the short, soft hair. "Keep talking, baby. Daddy misses you."

Kate knew the moment Castle picked up the phone, must've answered because Maisie's bright blue eyes widened and a smile blossomed across her face, making dimples form on her chubby little cheeks. Kate couldn't help the laugh that escaped her lips. She pulled the phone away from Maisie for just a second, she turned it on speaker phone and then held it between them.

"Castle?' She said.

"Kate. Hey." He sounded tired.

She felt bad, she probably woke him up. "Did I wake you?"

"Yeah, I was sneaking a little nap before my next signing."

"Oh, I'm sorry. We can call back later if-"

"No, no." He cut her off. "I want to talk."

Kate smiled a little. "I've got a little girl here who'd love to hear from her Daddy."

She could practically hear his smile. "Maisie?"

Maisie looked down at the phone, reaching out and poking at it with her little fingers. Kate gently took her hand, not wanting her to accidentally end the call. "Talk to Daddy, baby."

Maisie made some more noises, talking to them in her baby talk.

Kate smiled brightly.

"Really, Maisie? That's great!" Castle said animatedly, as if he understood the six month old gibberish.

Kate listened to them talk for a couple minutes, a huge smile plastered across her face, until Maisie let out a tiny yawn. Kate took the phone off of speaker phone and held it to her ear.

"Hey, Castle, I'm going to go put Maisie down for her nap. Just stay put."

She sat her phone down and picked Maisie up, grabbing the purple blankie from the back of the couch. She cuddled the little girl close as she carried her up the stairs. Castle and Beckett had been blessed with a baby that actually laid down for naps without crying. Kate hoped today would be the same.

She pushed the door to Maisie's bedroom open and walked inside, avoiding the couple of toys that were scattered on the floor from when they'd been playing that morning.

She kissed Maisie's forehead. "Nap time, baby girl." She whispered, laying her down in her crib.

Maisie looked up at her Mommy, her eyelids already drooping, but she kept her little hand tangled in Kate's sleeve. Kate smiled softly, running her finger soothingly down her baby's arm, down her belly, murmring softly as Maisie drifted off to sleep.

Kate pulled her hand back and reached across the crib to flick on Maisie's singing projector. It projected little birdies onto the ceiling while soft music played in the background. If Maisie happened to wake up, the projector would lull her back to sleep or keep her occupied until someone came to get her.

Kate checked that the baby moniter was on and then turned to slowly crept out of the room. She pulled the door until it was about halfway closed and then walked back downstairs. She sat back down on the couch with a huff, grabbing her phone from the coffee table. "Castle? You still there."

"Yeah. How'd Maisie go down?"

" usual." Kate said. "I swear, we must've done something really amazing in a past life to get a baby as perfect as she is."

Castle laughed a little. "Wait until she's a teenager. We'll probably be saying something else."

It was Kate's turn to laugh. "Don't say that, Castle." She groaned a little, joking.

They fell into a conversation about his trip, about how the fans like the new Nikki book, about the places he really wanted to bring her when she came next year. Because she was coming next year. He was determined to make it happen.

This year they decided that they didn't want to drag their six month old through Europe, but next year, next year she'd be a year and a half. Plently old enough for a trip.

"How's everything been?" Castle asked her.

She'd been nervous about being alone with Maisie. She was confident in her ability to take care of Maisie, she knew she would be fine, but she'd never been alone with a baby for such a long period of time. Two weeks is a long time to be alone with a six month old for the first time. She worried when she had to leave her with a babysitter, she worried when she put her down for naps, she worried that she wouldn't be able to hear the baby moniter in the middle of the night because Castle was usually the one to hear it. She wasn't ashamed to admit that Maisie spent those first few nights in bed with Kate, she laid in the bed until she fell asleep and then Kate would lay her in her playpen next to the bed.

"Good. Really good, actually."

"I told you that you'd be fine." Castle said, his voice soft. He really loved Mommy Kate. He loved every part of Kate, really. But Mommy Kate really tugged at his heart. She really was an amazing mother. "You're great with her."

Kate blushed a little, smiling at his words. It kind of amazed her sometimes, how he could still manage to make her blush like a teenager after all this time. "You're not so bad yourself, Castle."

"We're both pretty great, aren't we?"

She laughed a little. "We are." She paused. "So, what time do you think you'll be back on Saturday?"

"I don't know exactly. Hopefully around dinner time. Before Maisie goes to bed."

Kate smiled. "That'd be great. She'll be happy to see you. I think she missed your bedtime stories."

"You can read to her too."

"I do." She said. "But it's not the same. I don't tell stories quite like her best-selling novelist Daddy."

"I th-" He stopped, sighing a little. "Hey, I have to go. I'm late for my signing."

"Okay, call me tomorrow, okay?"

"Alright. I love you."

"I love you too." She said, making a kissing noise for him to hear. "Bye."

* * *

He's pissed.

So completely pissed.

And dissapointed. A little sad too.

His flight had been delayed so he didn't make it back to New York until well after midnight. He'd really wanted to read to Maisie, cuddle up with his wife. Maybe show her how much he's missed her.

He sighed a little as he kicked his shoes off and was met with a quiet loft. He hung his coat up and set his luggage aside. He decided to go check on Maisie first before going in to see Kate. He slowly walked up the steps, exhausted from the day he'd had. He pushed the door open quietly.

When he appraoched the crib, he found it empty. He couldn't help the little bit of panic that rose up in him. His heart began to beat a little faster. He turned and scanned the room, his eye caught the baby moniter, which was switched off. Miaise must've been with Kate, she'd never leave the room without switching that on.

He calmed down as he walked back downstairs, reminding himself to thank Kate for that mini heartattack in the morning.

He walked over to the playpin that was set up not two feet away from Kate's side of the bed. He looked down at the sleeping form of their daughter. He smiled as he watched her. She was absolutly beautiful, perfect. She looked just like her Mommy, but with his eyes. Her dark brown hair dried in little curls, just like Kate's whenever she lets her hair airdry. He reached down into the playpin and gently stroked his daughter's arm, thankful that she was a pretty heavy sleeper.

He watched the rise and fall of her chest, felt the softness of her skin, and fought the urge to pick her up. After a couple minutes he reluctantly pulled back, not wanting to wake her. He turned and quickly changed into some pajamas and then climbed into bed with Kate. He snuggled in behind her, spooning her smaller frame to his much like he'd done a year earlier.

This time, she didn't wake, she just relaxed back against him, so comfortable in his arms. He pressed a gentle kiss to her shoulder, so glad to be home.

* * *

**What do you guys think? This one didn't really go into detail about his trip. More about Maisie and them as parents, really. **


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